Marriage Counseling Insights brought to you by California Psychotherapeutic Resources, Inc.

Lewis Howes is a bestselling author who uses a variety of media channels to deliver his message: You Were Born For Greatness. Psychotherapist and bestselling author Esther Perel is recognized as one of today’s most insightful and original voices on modern relationships.

In this YouTube video, Howes interviews Esther Perel on the topic of successful relationships, especially romantic relationships, and the most common reasons relationships fail.

He begins by asking Perel a straightforward question: “What are the core reasons or the core things you see over and over that either end or make a relationship challenging to be in.”

With her typical insight and clarity of thought, she answers: “So there are always three questions, right?  What’s a thriving relationship? What can go wrong?  And how do you fix it?

“So you started with the middle question — What goes wrong?

“I think there’s a number of things in a relationship that become the cornerstones of the demise. I’m not going to list them in order but they all are part of each other. Indifference, contempt, neglect and violence are probably the four most important.

“I’m not talking about big violence — microaggressions are plenty.”

Watch this video to hear Perel not only discuss the pitfalls in a relationship but also explain what they key factors are in sustaining a long-term relationship that is deep and satisfying.