Good ol’ Aristotle is credited with saying, “We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence therefore is not an act, but a habit.” In fact, he was playing off a statement of his teacher, Plato, who said, “Character is simply habit long continued.” To truly understand the relationship between habit and character, it helps to understand that the Greek root for character means to engrave or etch. A little reflection reveals that forming habits — repeating an action over and over again — creates our character. As a real-world example, consider honesty. Repeatedly being honest with yourself and others, to the best of your ability, etches that habit into your soul and forms your character — defines you as an honest person.
What kind of character do you want to develop, in yourself or perhaps your children? Motivational speaker, author and coach to business leaders Jim Rohn, has some advice. He considered good character to be the essential foundation for success in business and as a leader. Writing on his website, JimRohn.com, he lists six essential traits of good character and cautions that missing any trait may be a person’s undoing.
Integrity. Speaking of the root meaning of words, the root for integrity comes from the Latin for “whole.” When a nation is whole, it is united and undivided. The same goes for a person. An individual with integrity always adheres to ethical principles, not simply blowing with the wind. Or, as Rohn says, “Another use of the word integrity that provides insight for us is when the word is used in regard to a physical structure. A wall or a building that is strong and has no cracks is said to have integrity.”
Honesty. Aside from “little white lies” the reasons for lying are usually fairly straightforward. People are typically very adept at understanding what will happen when they say something they know the other person does not want to hear. Consequently, they either fudge the truth a bit, do not reveal the whole truth or state something that is simply false. In all these cases there’s a motivating factor: fear. They’re simply afraid of the consequences of telling the truth. When someone discovers that person has lied there is a breakdown in trust, and trust is essential for a healthy relationship — whether it’s a personal or business relationship.
Loyalty. Standing by someone is easy in the good times. Loyalty is tested in hard times, and that is when a person’s character shows. A person of high character will stand by friends, family and associates in good times and bad. And if someone harms you in some way? The answer is forgiveness, which can actually strengthen a relationship. Rohn relates this to someone who is striving to lead a business or other organization by saying, “How this translates into making you a good leader is this: People want to follow a leader who will stretch them beyond where they are now, but who’ll also allow them to try — and to fail. When we are loyal to our followers, they’ll be loyal to us and make every effort to succeed on our behalf and on behalf of the organization.”
Self-Sacrifice. Motivation is at the core of self-sacrifice. Most people recognize someone who is motivated by personal gain. Fortunately, on the flip side, people instinctively admire someone who is a team player. The rewards of this attitude are significant, as Rohn points out: “When a leader shows sacrifice of personal gain, it says to the followers that they are willing to come alongside of them — and followers reward that almost universally. A person of good character shows that they can give up personal gain for the good of the whole.”
Accountability. There’s an essential trait required in people who hold themselves accountable for their actions: humility. It takes humility to live with the fact that no one is perfect. If you can honestly admit your own mistakes and take responsibility for them, you inspire respect. For leaders, as Rohn says, this in invaluable: “When we allow ourselves to be held accountable, our followers know that we are serious about keeping our own house in order, and thus will do a good job in leading the rest of the organization.”
Self-Control. Everyone is tempted to follow less-than-admirable desires. A person with self-control recognizes the temptation and says no. “Self-control is the ability to choose to do the things we should,” Rohn writes, “and to refrain from doing the things we shouldn’t.” Of course, choosing what we should or shouldn’t do is often not a black-or-white decision. That is when character reveals itself: when you habitually make choices that people respect, when doing what is right is etched into your being, then people can see the true nature of your character.