Respect – The Canary In The Coal Mine

Marriage Counseling Insights From Westlake Village-Based Patricia McTague-Loft

People are romantically attracted to someone for a variety of reasons. It could be basic physical attraction or a more analytical conclusion that they “check all the boxes.” (See What Are You Looking For In A Life Partner — And Why?) In any case, there are clearly a variety of important issues to consider as you develop a long-term relationship with someone. Everything from shared values to common interests are fundamental to building a healthy commitment that lasts.

One critical requirement of a long-term relationship that often escapes notice is the need for mutual respect. In fact, a lack of respect may be a not-so-subtle sign that you may in fact not share values or be attracted to each other in the same way.

Podcaster and best-selling author Mel Robbins talks about respect in a recent video where she points out the nine signs that you are in relationship where your partner does not respect you. “When we get into a relationship,” she says, “it gets really easy to dismiss the little things that can happen as — ah it’s just a one-off, ah it’s no big deal, it’s not going to happen again. I want to point out these nine behaviors that your partner may be engaging in and flag them. Because they are a real issue that cuts to the core of what creates a healthy and long-lasting relationship.”

Watch Mel as she begins with a discussion of what forms the foundation of a healthy relationship and moves on to examine why disrespect is a signal that the foundation is in danger.