Individual Counseling Insights From Westlake Village-Based Patricia McTague-Loft
People generally recognize that the most successful people — from CEOs to politicians — are not necessarily the smartest person in the room. Often, they have that most elusive quality: charisma. But successful businesspeople and leaders of all stripes also typically have a host of other characteristics as well. They have drive, tenacity, ambition, energy, resilience and confidence.
It should come as no surprise, then, that the latest research is showing that these other characteristics are as important as raw intelligence. In fact, soft skills — those elusive qualities we often find in successful people — are a key to success. Writing for Success.com Bryan Lindenberger says, “Soft skills are indispensable in today’s complex workplace, complementing technical prowess with essential qualities like communication, teamwork and adaptability. What’s more, “Data seems to confirm the critical role of soft skills in career advancement.”
Soft skills are practiced and honed through social interactions beginning in childhood. Also, people with exceptional soft skills often have a depth and diversity of life experiences to draw on. Soft skills cannot replace hard skills gained through education and training (there’s no substitute for proficiency in higher mathematics if you want to understand quantum mechanics), but a person with both advanced hard and soft skills has a true advantage in their profession.
Lindenberger goes on describe soft skills that he has identified as being in high demand.
Emotional intelligence. While every mentally healthy person has emotions, a person with high emotional intelligence, or EQ as it’s come to be known, is able to control their emotions — not simply suppress them. EQ, says Lindenberger, “enables individuals to recognize, understand and manage their emotions effectively, leading to better self-regulation and reduced stress.” Self-controlled people are able to work in teams much better than those who are not.
Empathy. A sympathetic person knows when another person is in pain or turmoil and acknowledges as much. An empathetic person not only acknowledges another’s pain, they also emotionally share in the other person’s experience. It is the difference between thinking and feeling. Expressed verbally or through body language, empathy is far more likely to communicate to the other person that you care and not simply understand. That can lead to invaluable connections when a situation arises between colleagues that calls for empathy.
Communication. Being able to effectively communicate is such a valuable ability that leaders are encouraged to assiduously study all forms of communication — writing, speaking and presenting. In our blog post, True Leadership Begins With This Fundamental Ability, we point out that “The value of moving people with words is especially valuable in business,” and offer four tactics for improving your skills. But there’s another aspect to communication that is equally important, as Lindenberger points out: “Clear and active listening as well as careful and measured expression are key components of communication.”
Adaptability. The world is changing fast. If you can’t adapt you’ll be left behind. That involves two things: flexibility and versatility, as we describe in Success In A Changing World. Another indispensable asset: the ability to see change as an opportunity for growth. Being adaptable helps you develop that mindset.
Resilience. The value of resilience is recognized across cultures That insight has led to venerable aphorisms such as the Japanese saying, Fall down seven times, get up eight. It’s simply a recognition that life is tough and experiencing some failures and hardships is inevitable. Not being resilient is an incredible obstacle to success. As Lindenberger points out, “An entrepreneur facing business setbacks may rely on resilience to persevere and eventually succeed.” For parents looking to give their kids an advantage see How To Help Children Build Resilience.
Self-Motivation. No one can force you to develop soft skills. You have to want to mature in every one of these ways. That’s why self-motivation is so critical. We discuss how important this characteristic is in How Important Is Motivation To Success?
Identifying soft skills is one thing, though — developing them is quite another. Lindenberger goes on to list 50 soft skills and then dives into tips for improving them here.